We're Havin' a Baby... Part Two!

Part Two of a story... read first part HERE.

Prenatal classes had informed me about having to push out the ‘afterbirth’ or placenta shortly after the baby came out. I had no idea what this entailed or what it looked like as it wasn’t something they’d shown on the 200 plus birthing TV shows I’d watched up to this point; in each episode baby would come out – cut to getting in the car going home scene.
A chill came over me as the water crossed over to the cool side of tepid. My body began to shake a little, Beth telling me that hormones were now flooding my body causing me to quiver. The baby was taken from my arms to get cleaned up and checked out.

“OK Dalyn let’s get this placenta out! Puuuuushhhhhhhh!” Beth pulled on the cord and the water went from clear to a deep shade of red. I lay there calmly, not knowing what to expect… What was normal in such situations? How long does it normally take to get these things out? Why is the water red? When can I hold my baby again? A few minutes passed with no result and I was pulled from the water, dried off and helped over to the bed we had set up in the living room. I lay there naked with a towel draped over me and they placed the baby at my breast. I looked down at her perfectly squishy face. Her mouth opened and took in my nipple… and she had her very first meal. Now, normally the baby staring to feed tells something in my body that its time to release the ol’ placenta, but for some unknown reason my uterus just wasn’t going to let it go. The midwife gave me a shot in the leg – oxy-something-or-other and minutes later I felt a surge within me… the contractions were staring again! They increased in length and then in pain, but still no afterbirth!
“OK Dalyn, were going to get you to stand up and push. Zol, you’re going to have to take the baby OK?” His face was stricken with the “But I don’t even know how to hold a baby!” look. Taking off his shirt he sat there on the couch, cradling our baby as I was lifted up to stand. Jess stood by my side, looking concerned. Beth pulled and pulled on the cord…. Nothing. More pulling… nothing. With blood dripping onto the pad below me Beth said, “Well Dalyn! The good news is your blood is clotting nicely!” I looked at Jess as she said this. Standing there naked, umbilical cord swinging between my legs I cracked a smile at Jess and gave him the two thumbs up signal. He smiled back nervously, returning my hand gesture. What better time for a little comedy?

A wave of exhaustion fell over me, and becoming dizzy I was laid back down. The painful contractions continued, but with nothing to show from them and with the clock ticking, Beth made an executive decision. We were going to the hospital. An ambulance would be arriving any minute to pick us up. Oh… OK. I hadn’t planned for this… I hadn’t planned for this at ALL. In my blind belief that nothing would send us to the hospital on the night of the birth, the personal bag for the baby and myself had not been packed. Jess raced about the house trying to put together what he thought might be useful for my stay there. Standing in the doorway, he held up a pair of 5 year old ‘period’ underwear that NOBODY was ever suppose to see (ladies, you know the ones I’m taking about!?). “Will these be OK? Do you wear these?” I nodded in embarrassment and he disappeared again to gather more things.

“The ambulance won’t have the siren on will it?” I asked desperately. A needle was being jabbed into my wrist for the second time, and an IV bag was then hooked up to it. Things began to happen quickly around me in preparation for the paramedic’s arrival. I heard footsteps on the staircase outside and looked up to see two men standing calmly in the doorway. Dizziness set in again…
Lifted into a sitting position, my head swelled with the heaviness of passing out… a dead weight inside your brain that you are unable to fight. Blind spots flashed in front of my eyes and my head bobbled in its fight to stay alert. They laid me down again.

A stretcher was brought in, a special one that was made for the sitting up position. Turns out that due to the big staircase out front I would have to be transported down the stairs in this ‘sit-up’ gig, and once down they would place me on the real stretcher, pop me into the ambulance and then speed off to the hospital. Sounds simple right? I suppose, so long as you haven’t lost a lot of blood and having painful contractions every few minutes. The paramedics lifted me up in their first attempt to place me in the seat. Never having passed out before I didn’t realize I was until the room went black before me within a matter of seconds. Back on the bed, lying down again, the dining room light came into view swinging above my head. Waiting until I’d gained full consciousness, they tried a second time and this is where everything just became a blur. I could hear metal clicking and clacking as they strapped me into the seat… my head was fizzy with lightheadedness, loose on it’s bearings and bouncing around like a bobble head doll. I felt myself being lifted up, and then tilted back in an attempt to get the blood back into my brain. A rush of cool air surrounded me and I saw the streetlight dancing through the trees. I heard footsteps going down the stairs… more clicking and clacking, I couldn’t stop my head from swaying side to side. At this moment something occurred to me. I could die. I could be dying right now… oh my god I had NOT planned for this! Then the weirdest thing happened. In a half awake state, my mind propelled itself into the middle of a dream – the kind you have when you are sleeping. I have no recollection now of what the dream was about, just that it was a short clip that had no beginning or end and made no sense at all. I felt my body laying flat now, blankets being wrapped around me. I opened my eyes to see an Indo woman in what I thought was a paramedic’s uniform looking down at me. She was saying something… everything went black. She was saying it again…

“Dalyn, Dalyn stay with me OK? It’s Beth, OK look at me… Dalyn, it’s me Beth!” I squinted my eyes but still only saw an Indo woman looking at me. I heard the sound of wheels on cement, the front gate clinking… it was so cold! Then LIGHTS! Big bright circles of light shone above me. I was in the ambulance now. A surge of pain rocked my body as my uterus contracted. “Good, good, you’re doing GREAT Dalyn.” Now I saw Beth beside me, her face shadowed from the blaring overhead lights. The ambulance began to swing back and forth as it traveled down what must have been the most potholed street in all of Vancouver! “So! The babies name, Graye… how do spell that?” I was confused by her question and a tad annoyed. You’re asking me how to spell my daughters name? “Ummm… G-R-A-Y---E… it’s… it’s a family name… OH GOD! IT HURTS!” I moaned and moaned my way through the contraction. Beth carried on with ‘light conversation’ all the way to the hospital. I realized later it was to keep me awake and coherent as my body was doing it’s best to pass out again.

Cue theme song to the show ER! Rolling down a sterile hallway, Beth at my side, people in scrubs passing by, long florescent lighting flashing above my head. Rolled into a room, another needle for another IV being poked into my arm, I came to as another contraction rolled through me. “Make it stop! PLEASE, just make it stop!” The events before me blurred again, doctors and nurses coming in and out. Then the familiar faces of Zol and Jess appeared, our baby swaddled in Zol’s arms. I smiled at him, his face racked with concern and confusion. Time moved slowly and after what seemed like an hour a doctor appeared at my side.

“OK Dalyn, bla bla, bla bla bla bla, OK? Bla bla bla and then bla bla bla and worst case scenario we will have to remove your uterus, alright?” I looked into his eyes and nodded, pushing out the words “OK”… I turned to see Zol’s face now ashen and white as a ghost from the doctor’s words. He handed off the baby to the midwife and leaning forward placed his head between his hands. Two seconds later his head lifted, his eyes rolled around like marbles and then back into his head. His body became limp and he slid off the chair and onto the ground beside me! Another contraction turned inside me as the nurse and midwife straighten him out on the ground…

I was being wheeled down another hallway… lights above me as we traveled to the operating room. What felt like 12 people surrounded me, their many conversations filtering in and out of my ears.

“OH PLEASE! Please, please… make it stop!” ANOTHER contraction! Still they spoke over me for what felt like half an hour. What the HELL was taking so long!??! Haven’t they done this before??? A nurse placed a plastic mask over my mouth. I couldn’t breath I couldn’t breath I couldn’t BREATH! “I CAN’T BREATH!” She released the mask a bit and I felt air in my lungs again… still the talking… KNOCK ME OUT!!! Oh SWEET jesus! Just KNOCK me OUT!!! My body began to shake uncontrollably… it shook and shook. A different mask was placed over my mouth… the room finally faded…

To be continued….!

We're havin' a baby... part one!

Returning to the kitchen from a trip to the bathroom, I stood at the sink barefoot and 8 months pregnant rinsing a few dishes. Zol had just come home from work, and as usual we chatted about the many idiots that had cut him off in traffic that day. As he ranted and raved I felt something strange happen ‘down below’.

Now I’m not sure if you have ever peed your pants, but my last recollection of doing so involved having to use the toilet madly and holding myself like a 5 year old for at least a half hour. I stood there staring at Zol, underwear wet, holding a dish in my hand.

“Ummm sweety? I - I think I just peed myself…” He looked at me blankly. “I JUST went to the bathroom! Weird…” It wasn’t enough pee to have it running down my leg, but a change of underwear was definitely in need. With a fresh pair on I continued with the dishes. A minute later my underwear was just as wet as before. I started laughing, as did Zol…

“Oh my GOD I’m PEEING myself and I can’t control it! How annoying is THAT?” We sat down to dinner, and upon standing up the whole back of my dress was soaked. OK, this isn’t pee, this is something else. This ‘leaking’ continued for an hour or so and I started to piece together the earlier part of my day.

A tad tired from the wonderful baby shower my friends had thrown for me the day before, I decided to venture out in search of a baby car seat. My hunt was futile; there was NO WAY I was going to drop $300 on something that we didn’t really need. Our friends had already given us their perfectly good used one. I was on my way to another store when my tummy seized up into a Braxton Hicks contraction. Pulling the van over to the roadside I touched my rock-hard stomach. This contraction was lasting longer than they usually did. Several more followed and I decided it was best to just go home. I called Zol and told him to check up on me in few hours, saying the contractions felt a little different today. Upon getting home I napped and when I woke up I felt fine again and started to make dinner.

After dinner that night the leaking continued and in my soggy underwear I sat at the computer and searched ‘water breaking + pregnancy’. Thanks to Hollywood my ‘idea’ of my water breaking was a massive gush that left me standing in a pool of fluids - turns out this rarely the case. If your water breaks at all, it sometimes comes out in small leak… much like a slight pee in your panties! I called my midwife and told her what was happening.

“I thought you’d be an early one!” she said. “Get to sleep early and your contractions will probably start around midnight.” My due date was still 11 days away and we were 11 days unprepared for our home water birth… VERY typical of us of course. This week we had planned to get the living room ready; take down the table, blow up the portable bed and the birthing pool… lay down the tarp… you know, home birthing stuff?! Zol was anxious to get started, but still in denial I said NO, lets just wait and see if this is for real. Around 9pm I started to have a slight pink hue in the ‘leakage’ and that’s when I knew it was the real thing.
A strange calm fell over me as I sat on the couch flipping through channels and watching my husband take down our massive dining room table.

I’m going to have a baby.

I AM GOING TO HAVE A BABY TOMORROW.

Holy SHIT, it’s happening.

With the table finally taken down we decided to go to bed at 10:30pm. I laid there, becoming more uncomfortable with every tick of the clock. By 11pm it went from uncomfortable to something else.

12:00am… “Hun, I think I’m having contractions…”
It’s really hard to explain a contraction. The closest thing I can compare it to is the feeling that you have just before you have to puke violently, but without the nausea if that makes any sense? Imaging the uncontrollable feeling that your body has JUST before you blow major chunks. Your body becomes engulfed in itself and there is NO stopping what’s about to happen… and then a minute long surge that coats every fiber within you ------------------------- and then its over. That was a contraction for me.

We were half way through our prenatal classes at this point and had yet to learn how to time contractions. Rolling out of bed and into my office I sat at the computer and searched ‘timing contractions + pregnancy’. The pain was speratic and ununiform, but they were contractions, no doubt about it! Every 2 to 5 minutes Zol could hear my grunts and groans as I sat at my computer timing each surge. By midnight I’d had it and told Zol to get up and blow up the pool.

As preparations for the homebirth commenced I called my midwife. It was great to hear her clam voice on the other end of the line. She listened to me as I went through several contractions, telling me I was doing a great job. She told us to call her back when the contractions were 2 minutes apart, over a minute long and steady for 3 hours. I hung up the phone and focusing on a small nub of fabric on the blanket at my feet, this carried on for around two and half hours. Zol did his best to ‘time’ the contractions. They were all over the board and the only thing that was remotely consistent was the fact that they were getting closer and closer together. I puked up my dinner into a bowl, laughing as I did it. I couldn’t bring myself to walk around or take a hot shower as recommended, I just sat there on the couch and rocking and moaning. Zol sat across the room, notebook in hand, writing down the events as they happened… we’d previously decided that I didn’t want ANY kind of coddling or touching while going through a contraction, it would be much too annoying!

3am… “Call Beth Zol…. ZOL!!!!! CALL BETH!!!!” He dialed our midwife. He spoke briefly with her but she could hear me in the background. I must have sounded like a demon straight out of hell… such a deep guttural grunting sound was all I could muster. “I NEED TO PUSH! IIIIII NEEEED TO PUUUSH!!!!!” Beth hearing me, told Zol to make me STOP! NOT to push and she’d be there in 15 minutes. Zol then called my best friend Jess, who I wanted at the birth and he hopped in a taxi. Like she said she would be, our midwife Beth was there in less than 15 minutes… and Jess shortly there after.

“OK Dalyn, I’m just going to check you out, but your going to have to spread your legs a bit OK?”
“OH GOD, no no no… I can’t I CAN’T!” but I guess I did, or she pried them open! Her head popped up with a look of surprise.
“WOW, OK, your fully dilated! Lets get you into the pool!” The birthing pool was now full of warm water sitting in front of me. I don’t remember my PJ’s being taken off or Zol and Beth lifting me into the pool, but once that warm buoyant water surrounded me I felt a world of relief!

Jess arrived shortly after I was lowered into the pool, calmly walking in with an air of comic relief to him.
“Hey guys????? ????” He took a seat on the couch beside the pool. I felt a slight sense of relief now that he’d arrived.

Zol seemed tense yet supportive to me, but in a way needed his own support… turns out Jess would be JUST what he would require on the near horizon!

3:20am… “OK Dalyn, don’t push yet… look me in the eyes… Dalyn? Dalyn? LOOK at me… OK you’re doing great! You’re doing an amazing job! Dalyn? Dalyn? OK, LOOK at me… Keep looking at me… OK PUSH!!!” I pushed with everything that was in me. The contraction passed. It was an out of body expierience that I can’t compare to anything! The pain was gone, but now it basically felt like I was taking the biggest shit of my life! In between the contractions my body felt normal – painless as I floated in the warm water. Then I smelt something… like someone had placed a piece of burning toast RIGHT in front of my face! Zol appeared at my side with a pot of hot water, releasing it into the pool to warm it up.

“TURN IT OFF!! WHAT IIIIS THAT??? TURN IT OFF!!!!!” The smell was incredibly intense and obtrusive, breaking my process of traveling into the ‘birthing side’ of my brain. By heating up water in a pot something we’d previously cooked had spilled onto the heating element and the smoke (that nobody else could smell) was permeating the room and driving me insane!

3:30am… “OK Dalyn, with this next contraction you can push OK? But when I say stop, you need to hold off alright?” I stared at Beth’s warm eyes, so calm, so knowing. It’s rare that one looks deep into the eyes of someone she trusts that knows what is best for ones self. I don’t know that I’ve ever trusted someone as much as I did at that very moment. The need to push fell over me in a wave, Beth keeping my crazed stare aline with hers. The wave passed but quickly came back. I PUSHED….

“Do you want to see the head?! The heads right there Dalyn! Do you want to see it??” This meant somehow spreading my legs, so I passed on the new view of what was happening below. I felt nothing… NO PAIN. Amazing… but JEEZ LUOIS JUST GET IT OUT OF ME!!!!

3:50am… “Alright Zoltan, do you want to catch the baby?” In a blur I saw his face, apprehensive and sweet and scared. It makes me cry while I write this. In a hospital this situation would never have come to past… my husband kneeled on the floor in front of the pool, looking me in the eyes as my last contraction released our daughter into her new world… with the help of Beth he pulled her from the water and onto my breast and then wrapped his arms around the both of us. AMAZING. Our baby girl was alive and breathing, floating in the warmth of the water. Covered in vernix, cheesy from day one! Graye made sweet baby sounds and laid softly at my heart. Jess smiled at my side, looking down at his new goddaughter and Beth conversed with the second midwife who had just barely made it in the door before the birth…

Life was sweet and amazing and in our arms… we laid floating in it for what seemed like forever…

“OK Dalyn, now we just have to get you to push out the placenta, OK?” WHAT? Push out what? Still holding my baby they had me push… and push and push…. and PUSH. nothing. PUSH PUSH PULL PULL… the embolic cord was short. “OK, push HARD!... HARDER…”

To be continued…

i had a baby...

hello all...
well if you didn't already know, i've popped out my little one. she was 11 days early! Graye Roza Szilvassy came out with no trouble at all... 4 hour labour! the afterbirth, or placenta... well, it wasn't so fun. it was an 'interesting' experience complete with water birth, postpartum hemorrhaging and a then a nice trip to the hospital! all is well and both baby and myself are in perfect health. an entire blog posting will be dedicated to the story.

i thought id post a link to my prenatal pics... they are a tad unconventional, so be warned! we did a 60's take on prenatal life and we both love the results! our good pal Zipporah Wilson, an AMAZING photographer was just as excited as we were to try out the senerio!

http://seedlingimages.com/day_belly
or
here
ps. smoke was added LATER... i wasn't really smoking!
zippys website can be found here.